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I Want a Husband

There was a time when society dictated that men and women should go through the proverbial “tying the knot’ affair. Marriage with three kids, a dog, and a house with a white picket fence was yesterday’s “In” thing. Anyone defying this doctrine was considered as an outcast and had no place in social functions. The women were expected to stay at home, cook all the meals, clean the house, do the laundry, and take care of the children and the husband, all the while squeezing in time to socialize with neighbors and friends.

The men however worked your average 9-5 jobs, fulfilling the requisite for being a good provider by bringing home an adequate paycheck. Asking an obligatory “How was school today? ” to the kids would more than suffice the criteria for being a good father. After all, it was a woman’s job to actually raise the children. And of course, a man wouldn’t be a man if he didn’t perform his marital duties in bed to his wife where, more often than not, the only person left with any satisfaction would be the male partner. After performing these seemingly taxing responsibilities, the average husband is entitled to “whet his whistle”.

Cigars with his golf buddies or post-dinner beers in front of the television were his way of de-stressing after a hard days work. Enter the age of computers, where microchips can process data faster than it takes a person to blink and the Stepford wives have become more or less obsolete. Where a woman’s place used to be at home being housewives, the women of today can be seen in hospitals, the courtrooms, major companies and even in construction sites. They have flourished in an age where the average Eve is no longer restricted by social construct to use her brain and the best of her abilities.

Then again, after all the hype has gone down and she comes home to no one in particular, every major achievement seems so empty without someone to share her elation with. That is why marriages still take place. The need to share the highlights of your life with someone is so overwhelming. I Want a Husband 3 While there are women who prefer to live their lives without the hassles of marriage, there is still a majority of them who see themselves walking down the aisle towards a lifetime commitment with the one they love. I believe I am one of them.

I would like to actually get married at a comfortable age of 30, when I have had my fill of living life a single woman. I don’t want to have to say “I wish I could have done that…” when I’ve already settled down. Marriages that actually work are rarely those done in a spur of the moment. Knowing what you want in a lifetime partner and in the partnership itself could actually help your cause in preserving a marriage. Like most women, I too have my “list” of what an ideal husband is for me. Respect comes high on my list. I want a husband who would be able to give me the kind of respect I want and need.

He needs to be able to hear out and actually listen to what I have to say and not scoff as if my opinion is a laughing matter. If what I’m proposing is in any way unreasonable, I want him to tell me in a civilized manner and not gawk as if I’d lost my head. I want to be able to reason with him and he needs to accept any idea I have that is worth talking over and is actually sensible, not brush it aside just because the idea came from me, not him. I want a husband, who can think of me as an equal, not treat me any less capable of doing anything just because I’m a woman.

He should give me an equal division of rights when it comes to making decisions, however minor, about the house and anything concerning the family. Equality would mean that he should help out with tasks around the house even if it would mean doing things that is, according to social construct, done by women. I want a man who would be able to wash the dishes with me and sometimes even the laundry and not grumble as if doing such is a terrible crime. I want someone who would do the grocery shopping once in a while, someone who’d be happy to change the baby’s diapers.

I would also want my husband to be able to cook for my family. Not all the time but on occasions that I’d be busy with work or just because he feels like cooking for us for a change. Women I Want a Husband 4 value special occasions like anniversaries and birthdays so I hope my husband would never forget these dates and better have surprises up his sleeves. I would gladly appreciate some romance to liven up the marriage as the honeymoon years roll by. Even though it would seem boring to most couples, I would like my husband to take me to romantic dinners or go see a movie once in a while.

I want a husband who is considerate, a considerate father and a considerate lover. I want him not to just think of what’s best for him but also what’s best for his family. I want a husband who would want me to continue my career and trust me enough to make things work even with my juggling both it and family life at the same time. If it’s not working out, I would need him to help me think of a compromise so that I could meet both halfway. It’s not as easy as it looks so I would appreciate it if my husband would be my rock, my inspiration, a paragon of understanding.

I want him to be a hands-on father. I want him to be able to go to our children’s school event like soccer games, school plays and I want him to be able to keep track of our children’s academic performance. Once in a while, I would like him to be able to help with the kids’ homework. Finally, I want a husband who would never deliberately hurt me, physically or otherwise. I want us to be able to open up to each other as if we’re friends and not tell lies to each other. Half of these requirements are probably on the list of every spouse-seeking female out there.

With the way society has programmed I doubt that there is an actual husband-to-be that can actual match even a quarter of what’s on this list. Then again, even while women know that they can never find the perfect husband, they continue to hold on to their list hoping that maybe he is a rarity that, if she’s lucky enough, would come into her life when she least expects it. After all, that is the purpose of having an ideal. Kind of like trying to reach the stars, knowing that they can never be had but you look to them anyways to guide you when you’re lost.

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