Online Relationships
The number of online relationships has been intensifying every day. Random people from different geographical locations build up mutual interests, and mostly end up meeting each other. 57% of the people use internet to flirt. These meetings take shape of temporary flings, marriages, dating, one night stands, rape, murders and robberies. These relationships are just not limited to intimate horizons. Cheap and accessible modes of communication have broadened the horizons of doing business. Online trading and shopping are now a common means of buying and selling.
Alongside, internet based technologies have also instigated the creation of virtual teams. Like all other relationships, these too are based on trust. It helps people in relationship who live in different cities to maintain a healthy companionship over internet. The feasibility of being close to the person becomes very convenient. Each new software has different features that help people to connect by means of sound, visuals and text. In the absence of physical proximity, chances of fraud and scams are very high. People may forge an entire profile. The basis of honesty and reliability is very low.
Dr. Monic Whitty did a survey of people who had internet friends. Her survey had 160 men and women. The results revealed that men lied more as compared to women. They lie about their gender, occupation, family, education and family. Women lied for their own security basis . Irrespective of the risks involved, people are still very enthusiastic about online relationships. Tip for handling online personal relationship with unknown people People from the Internet are not just virtual creatures but living human beings, should be treated with utmost respect and dignity.
Not everyone online will share their true values and feelings. It is better to keep the expectation level as minimal as possible. Take out time everyday to get to know the other person a little better. A mutual time or a meeting schedule can also be set. Give him/her your undivided attention and pay interest to their minutest details. The use of online tools such as voice conferencing and web camera simmers down the boundary of hesitation between two strangers. Exchanging emails and leaving offline messages can act as a catalyst in bringing two unfamiliar people closer.
Give a little significance to the person’s personal life; his/her likes and dislikes, family background, work, education and many other corners that might have some consequence in the other person’s life. Be honest about your personality. If one is handicapped, uneducated, divorced or have any other such issue, one should be open and clear about it. It is rather immoral to lie about yourself and expect the other person to be honest to you. Rushing into things might make everything more complicated. Give every relationship some time. Knowing someone from cyber world is more difficult than in the real world.
Ask as many questions as you want . Be sure to find out important details that might help locate the real identity of a person. One should refrain from getting into a serious commitment with anyone from the internet, no matter how serious and warm the discussions become. Proper time should be devoted before taking it to the next level. It is natural to develop feelings, but one must not get blinded by it. In case the person you meet from the internet tries to sexually harass you, don’t be afraid to report him/her to the relevant authorities. This might save another soul from falling into the trap.
All valid identities and descriptions related to that person should be disclosed. Take the example of Alicia Kozakiewicz, who was kidnapped, held captive at basement, beaten and also raped by her internet friend Scott Tyree. He also posted her pictures on the internet of this duration. Now he is jail serving 20 years sentence for his crime . Precautions It is very important to know a person thoroughly before one decides to meet someone from internet. Background verification and phone reconfirmations always help to authenticate person’s real identity . It is not healthy to rely on pictures exchanged over the internet.
Live feed from a web camera at least gives an assurance about the person’s existence. And so one can know how the person looks in reality; to validate if he was honest about his gender, age and nationality. It’s always better to meet at a public place. This reduces the chances of physical assault or any sort of mishap. After a few encounters at a public place, if the person genuinely turns out to be sane, the relationship can be carried to another level. Parents must sit with their children and have an open discussion with them over crimes committed by cyber identities.
The importance of being safe and secure around an unknown person from the virtual world of internet should be discussed at home. Never give out personal details like residential address, work, house or mobile phone numbers, bank account details, credit card numbers or social security numbers. The person you might end up trusting is just a screen name and may have a criminal background. Thorough investigation is highly important before giving out any information. There is no harm in tagging a friend along when two strangers from the internet meet. It increases the security horizon.
It is essential to be precautious about every move that a person makes. In case of a deception, it is easier to come out of the cheat without being hurt. Do not judge people with just a couple of conversations. Some people are very good with writing skills and exploit people with their writing skills . Opinions are usually made on the basis of age, sex, locality, demographic that are being stated by the other side of the computer. It is not important that a person is being honest about his personal details. Name and identity can also be false . It is imperative to notify parents or someone from the family about it.
In case things turn out to be bad, family members can help. Do not depend of your online friend’s transportation. If the situation arises, carrying money and a cell phone can help in a hasty exit. Tip for handling long distance online relationship Couples living in different countries are now, with the help of internet, keeping their relationship very strong. By keeping just a few things in mind, this long distance relationship can be as fresh as it was the first day. The missing element of physical proximity can be somewhat replaced with video and chat conferencing.
Take out time from your busy agenda to meet your beloved ones online. Write them an email when they are least expecting it. It’s always nice to come back from a hectic day of work and read an email from your dearly beloved. Show each other what you’ve shopped for recently or any home decor item that you may have bought. Play songs for each other and sing it out loud. Play online games together. Take quizzes to break the monotony. Remember events and wish your partner. One can also send gifts through a courier service. Two people can also make a joint account to do more things together.
Distance should not act as a hindrance between couples. Keen interest in your partner’s life is very important. Be it personal or professional one should be updated about it. Don’ts Avoid arguments and sarcasms over internet or the phone – words can be misinterpreted. Absence of gestures and uncertainty of the tone can also complicate things and leave people with joint emotions. Internet connections can also get messed up which might leave a conversation unfinished, and thus giving the impression the other person is not interested to talk things out.
It is very essential to maintain the level of trust when you are not with your partner . In the absence of trust, all the hard work and effort being put up by your lover might go to waste. Avoid being demanding about time and attention. Mutual consent can avoid many fights and disagreement. Don’t take your long distanced spouse out of your priority list. Keep some time dedicated to him. Don’t leave him waiting online while you go shop or hang out at clubs with your friends. Risk Factor involved in online relationships The world of cyber space is full of tricks and deceptions.
People at times appear to be what they are not. They lie about their personal details; it is very easy to create false identification. The world of the internet opens many unexplored spheres for people of all age. Talking to a stranger can be an addiction and attraction. People give up their senses for someone they’ve never met before. People conceal their real identity. Gays and lesbians become straight, old people become teenagers, married people pretend to be single, occupations are changed and a new personality is created. People may display wrong pictures and information are manipulated.
Most of the time strangers online look forward to having sex partners. They talk girls into sending out nude pictures which they later post on pornographic websites. Convince them to make videos of them so they could post them to adult sites. Mostly their intentions are to have sex on the first date. Girls should be careful about using precautionary measures when they decide to meet and sleep with a complete stranger. Either of them might have a sexually transmitted disease which can be very dangerous. It’s natural to be attracted to someone and want to be with them at a closer level but safety measures should not be ignored.
An online dating statistic report done by The Sunday Times stated that almost 33% of all internet encounters lead to a date. As compared to 52% of mean, 75% of women admitted to have an online affair with a complete stranger . If two anonymous people decide to meet if should be restricted to a public environment. Hotel rooms, motels and private houses should be avoided. After a few encounters if the person does not appear to be suspicious the two can move to a private locality. People end up stalking and harassing their online friends .
They could be anyone including from a co worker, neighbors, class mates, unhappy married man, sexually frustrated, people with STD, rapist or maybe a psycho killer. Taking an example of a married man, Thomas Montgomery, who shot one of his co-workers out of jealousy because his online-friend, was also talking to her. Trust should be build over a time period after a few meetings. They could only be talking to you for some money, sympathy or sex. Trusting these cyber strangers is as simple as inviting troubles. It is fundamental to set a limit for yourself to be safe and secure. Try gathering different information about that person.
One can try talking to the same person with multiple usernames to see if he is honest and consistent about the details he gave out. Or cross check on the information provided by him. People may also use harmful software to enter your personal computer and retrieve your data. Accepting files or Trojans can corrupt the hard disk of a computer. One should be careful with accepting any unknown files or emails. Keeping a realistic approach is far better then entering a day dream. Expecting so much out a stranger can lead to deception and betrayals. One should not go against their families and friends for some one they’ve never met.
If someone avoids giving out details about daily chores, jobs, family members, there is seriously something wrong somewhere. It is better to cross-question with different styles rather than assume that everything is perfect. According to a survey, 50% of online conversations are related to sex. Most of the people involved in such conversations are either married or looking for a one night stand . Adultery is very common on the internet. 46% of men believe denies online affair as adultery . People even get separated and break marriages for the sake of unseen cyber affairs.
Ric Hoogestraat is having a troubled married life with his wife Sue Hoogestraat because he’s having an internet affair with Janet Spielman. They play an online game where they are married with each other, have 2 dogs, pay mortgage together, spend hours shopping and taking a ride on the bike. His involvement with this game is now affecting his married life . Online Romance Many people develop the intensity of romance over internet. Many dating sites have also emerged over the years. People meet random people, exchange a little information and upon mutual interest, take this cyber romance to the next level.
A number of online affairs have been growing at a constant pace . The medium of internet is used to find a partner for a lonely soul. People, who are shy to face the world, physically disabled, coming from broken marriages, or have crossed the age of young love, use this platform to build connection with the outer world . Along the same lines, young school and college students glue themselves to the internet in search of their ultimate love partner. A study conducted by Mark Griffith five different people were observed, belonging from different age group and lifestyle.
It was noticed that out of these five people only two of them were actually addicted to internet. Rests were in it to offset their own deficiencies like physical appearance, shyness, lack of social group etc . Internet romance is not just restricted to dating websites. People meeting in chat rooms, gaming zones, blogs and different forums also initiate a conversation if they end up building chemistry. People after talking for months with each other end up meeting. If the understanding still continues they also start dating or eventually get married.
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