Attachment Process

In the article, the author describes the behaviors which babies indulge in, and the reasons for these behaviors. The author states that babies are “born with a set of behaviors” and the reaction of adults to these “commanding” behaviors, promotes “attachment” which is vital for the healthy development of individuals. The author gives an excellent and touching example of a “chain reaction” in which a baby howls when hungry demanding the attention of the adult and in response to this behavior, the adult rushes with “breast or bottle” to suffice the little baby.

What follows is a chain of stimulus and response in which the child, at first, indulges in “furious sucking” which later “loses its frantic quality”. Responding to this, the adult too relaxes and the adult’s “face shows pleasure”. The exchange of glances between the baby and the mother and the clutching of the mother’s little finger by the baby’s tiny little hands, are the stepping stone to the positive attachment process between the two, which is also the most crucial factor in the healthy overall development of the child.

The emotions of relaxation and pleasure on the mother’s face brings a smile on the child’s face and is evidence to the close relationships between the two illustrated through the baby clamping the mother’s finger and the smile on the mother’s face. Being a loving and trusting person, I feel that I have received care and love from my mother, my care giver. I do remember my mother being available for me when I was a young child. The fact that I am a serene and balanced individual, proves the attention I have received from my mother and this has aided in my complete development, social and psychological.

While a reaction may be not necessarily be initiated by the baby alone, it could also be an adult who “begins a chain” and attracts the baby’s attention. The adult may bend over the baby and attract the attention with a gentle smile, causing the baby to react by wiggling the “arms and legs” in excitement. In response the adult speaks and this time the baby reaches out for the adult’s “lips with her finger” in an act of love. The reaction may end with the adult kissing the baby lightly and it is these “little scenes” and interactions which enable the baby to form relationships with one or many adults.

Apart from my mother, I also had my father and grandmother, living in the family. as such, I was able to receive love and care from them as well. Although my father did not have mush time for me, he would ensure that we meet at least once a day and spend some time together, having fun and playing games. My grandmother, an extremely loving lady, used to look after me when my mother was away for some tasks. So, as a child, I have been brought up with utmost care and attention, which is also the reason why, I trust people and am able to form healthy and long lasting relationships in my social life.

Nevertheless, not all babies may find “responsive adults” in their lives and the “insensitive environment” due to lack of “reciprocal interactions”, may not facilitate the building of relationships between babies and adults. Not all relationships begin in this encouraging and reassuring manner and there are many instances of babies’ cries not being responded positively. When the reaction of babies are not reciprocated in a timely and warm manner, babies fail to develop “chain reactions”, which are the basis of attachment forming process through which babies learn to form relationships pf love, care and understanding.

I am lucky that I have had no such negativity in my familial bonding, and from my nature, I can gauge that I must have been raised with love care and attention. Nevertheless there were some experiences at school which were negative and are not worth remembering. When I went to junior school, I distinctly remember one teacher, who was very harsh and rude to me. She did not like me and would often call me names. I was afraid of her and would often go home and cry. After a few days, I began to hate school and did not want to go to school, since this had terrible effects on my esteem.

My mother realized that something was wrong, and spoke to the principle, after which the teacher was removed from school for bad behavior. This incident stayed with me for quite sometime and I had difficulty in showing trust towards my teachers again. However, the new teacher was good and I soon forgot about my previous teacher and began to respect and love her. When the response of adults is “cold and impersonal” and babies have no adults to engage in sensitive responsive behaviors, the attachment behaviors of babies will gradually reduce and in some extreme cases will also disappear.

The effects are usually visible later in life when they find a “harder time attaching” to people whom they can care for or be cared by. Early in life, during infancy, babies become insensitive and when “responsive adults” do not facilitate appropriate “chain reaction” which are crucial lessons for the baby to learn how to form sensitive, caring and loving reaction with others. The process of attachment is crucial for life and is responsible for the healthy development of individuals in all its aspects, “physical, social, emotional and intellectual”.

I am happy that I have been raised in a responsible and loving manner which has enabled me to develop a good personality with the help and care I received from my family, particularly, my mother. Although she wanted to continue with school and education, she gave it all up for me when I was born and completed her education after I was a little older and began to go to school regularly. I am thankful to her, my father and my grandmother for giving me the necessary love, care and attention so that I could develop not only physically, but socially and psychologically as well.

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